Procrastination isn’t just for adults, it’s
a defense mechanism against stress and anxiety that often
develops in childhood. Procrastination is not a character trait that any parent
would wish on their child. However, turning a blind eye to the symptoms of a growing
procrastinator is very easy to do.
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Here’s how you can stop procrastination in
its tracks before it gets the best of your child!
Recognize
the True Reasons for Procrastination
Billy decides not to take out the trash
because it’s “too cold.” Annie skips her math homework because she figures
she’ll get the answers wrong anyway. It’s easy to shrug off both these children
as “lazy kids,” but there’s more to their stories than that.
Billy finds the act of taking out the trash
unpleasant. He’s not motivated to do the job. He doesn’t have a
problem with laziness, however; he has a problem with motivation.
Annie has trouble with algebra and is sure
that she’s going to fail her homework. By skipping the assignment, she can
blame her “F” on procrastination rather than an intellectual shortcoming. Annie
isn’t lazy; she’s safeguarding her ego from the pain of personal failure.
Procrastination always boils down to
self-preservation. The procrastinator doesn’t want to feel stupid, bored, or
distressed. Putting off unpleasant tasks is not a symptom of laziness. It’s a
symptom of being human!
Establish
Accountability
Accountability is a big word and a big
concept, especially for little people, but it can help a lot with
procrastination. Kids need to understand that they’re responsible for certain
things, and they need to feel rewarded when they act the right way.
Here are three ways that you can help
your child remember the chores/tasks for which he or she is responsible for:
- Post a list on the fridge.
- Create and write a written contract
together.
- Use anti-procrastination apps like Yelling Mom, a reminder app, or Beat Procrastination, a behavior
modification app.
- Make a Reward System
Some well-meaning behaviourists will tell
you that painful punishment is a vital part of “unlearning” a bad habit. With
developing children, however, it’s more important to reward success than
to punish failure.
External rewards like money, sweets,
and gifts tend to reduce a child’s motivation. Here are three excellent ways to
reward a child verbally:
- “Wow! You must feel really good about
yourself for getting that math homework done.”
- “I am proud of you for remembering to
take out the trash without being asked.”
- “You make me feel so happy when you
complete the tasks on your list!”
As a parent, you are also your child’s life
coach. You don’t want to see your son or daughter suffer a lifetime of
procrastination disasters, so you do everything you can to enhance their personal
development.
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