Teens and depression: the danger signs

In its mildest form, depression is the most common psychological problem for teenagers. While it was uncommon a generation or two ago, we now see more diagnoses than ever, and some experts predict that depression will become the psychological ‘flu’ of the 21st century.


We usually describe depression as ‘feeling sad’, but without being aware of its other symptoms, it can be misdiagnosed.

How to know if your teen is depressed

“I hate me. I really hate me. I hate the way I look. I hate the way I feel. I hate how I do everything wrong. The world would be better off without me. My family would be better off without me. I shouldn’t even be alive.”

Depression has emotional symptoms (like a loss of enjoyment in activities that were once fun), but it also has cognitive symptoms (like pessimism and hopelessness). It has motivational symptoms (like feeling apathetic), and it also has physical symptoms (like eating and sleep disturbances).

According to the psychological model that has been used for the last two decades, adolescent depression requires a person to be:

1. Extremely depressed
2. A loss of interest and pleasure in most or all activities
3. Significant weight loss or weight gain
4. Insomnia, or sleeping too much
5. Being physically agitated and constantly moving (although some people with depression don’t want to move at all.)
6. Fatigue
7. Feelings of worthlessness, or feeling guilty for anything and everything
8. Being overly indecisive, having difficulty concentrating, or not wanting to think about anything
9. Feeling like life would be better if they were dead.
Most psychologists would give a diagnosis of depression to your teenager if they exhibited at least five of these nine symptoms at the same time, consistently, during a two-week period.

How common is depression in young people?

Depression is relatively uncommon in pre-adolescent children – studies indicate somewhere around 1-2 percent.

Adolescents appear to experience depression at similar rates to adults. Close to 20% of us will experience depression at some point in our lives, with around 5-6 percent of our teens (and us) having a clinically depressive episode in any given year. Our daughters are particularly vulnerable, with research indicating depression is twice as likely to affect females than males.

What do I do if I think my teen is depressed?

Some people’s natural reaction might be to tell them to ‘pull themselves together’, but this is rarely an effective strategy. Instead, I suggest the following:

1. Have a good heart to heart. If their symptoms match those listed above, suggest a visit to the GP for more advice. Then get a referral for a psychologist.

2. If depression is diagnosed, research generally suggests the best treatment is a combined pharmacological (drugs) and cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT) approach.

3. Research tells us that even if our teenagers get good help, they’ll struggle to work through their symptoms if their parents are depressed. So make sure every parent is ok, too.

4. Encourage your children to spend time with friends who help them feel good about themselves.

5. Make sure their school environment is a positive one.

6. Discourage alcohol and drug use – and be clear about it.

7. Reduce stress in their environment.

8. Encourage exercise, appropriate sleep and healthy eating.

9. Help them be good at something. Developing competence builds confidence and feelings of worth.

Lastly, if you spot your adolescent slipping into any negative thinking habits, talk to them about it. Build your relationship with them. Help them know how much you value them by spending time with them. Your relationship with them may be the thing that makes all the difference.

Has depression affected your family?

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