Helping your teenager
get the grades you know they are capable of will never be a stress-free
journey. But, probably know this already!
There are always going
to be highs and there’ll always be lows, dealing with the highs is easy. Jump up
and down; do a dance, go stuff your faces with junk food in celebration of your
teens amazing achievement. So, how do you deal with the lows? Do you go with
tough love, like take away their cellphone or lock them in their room? This is
the way some people would deal with it, but such measures are so last century
and do more harm than good!
Look at things from
your teen’s point of view for a second. If your teens grades aren’t where they
should be and they’re not motivated about school, then it’s obvious that they’re
already not having a super fun time.
Knowing that you are
mad and frustrated is not going to make them feel any better, and it’s definitely
not going to turn them into a straight-A student!
So, why don’t tradition punishments work?
Well, if your teenager has non motivation at school, it’s probably because they
don’t see how it’ll help them later in life. You as a parent understand it
perfectly. You know that it is important to get the best grades you can in
order to have a better future.
But, unfortunately a teenager’s brain works
differently. The results of not doing well in school don’t flash in their mind
when they are too lazy to study or fail a test. Actually teens that are
motivated do understand, and that’s the difference.
That’s why traditional punishments are
completely useless. Taking away all privileges, locking them in their rooms,
forbidding them to go out with their friends, how is this supposed to help? It’ll
probably do the opposite effect and make them angry at you.
Your teen has to have a reason to want to
go to school and do well, otherwise they don’t see a point and they give up.
So, if not punishments, then what? Your
teenager is not five years old anymore (duh). They have ideas, thoughts and opinions;
you shouldn’t expect them to respond to threats or bribes!
If you want your teen to do something, then
they’re going to have to want to do it. It isn’t the Middle Ages; you can’t
just lock your teen in their room and take away their belongings. This isn’t going
to help in any way; you’re going to be waiting a very long time to see an A+.
The best thing to do is talk to them like
the young adult they are. Discuss with them what they like doing, what subjects
they enjoy or what they see themselves doing after school.
The connection between trying hard at
school now and good things happening later probably won’t be made overnight,
but it’s really important to make sure your teen knows you’re on their side.
They need to know that you are proud of
them no matter what happens, as long as they tried their best.
Punishments are so last century, let’s
leave them in the history books and create a positive environment!
The Assisted Learning Centre is a college
that supervises and tutors grades 8 to 12; we are located in the coastal town
of Fish Hoek on the False Bay side of the Cape Peninsula. Enroll today and provide your teenager with the best education they could possibly hope for!
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